roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
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You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
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I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
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