It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?