i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Green mimosas i think yes
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
