She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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