honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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