Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
