The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
