Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize