I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
