so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Randomize
