So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
where are you?
Hypothermia
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
