fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
