go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
Randomize