I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
