Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
