Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
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so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
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I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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