would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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