Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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