as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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