i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
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