Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
