I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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