wakey wakey hands off snakey
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
high people should be assigned attendants
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
