I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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