Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
