What did we do last night that was yellow?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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