It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize