OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
as a side note pls kill me
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
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