Define "chronic" masturbator.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
