Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
whose parrot is this?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
My life is pants optional.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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