Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Randomize
