Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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