its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
