i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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