i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize