Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
