Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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