I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
