I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
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