I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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