so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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