oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
