I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
