Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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