it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
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