Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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