I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
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Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
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