sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize