I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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