Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
