but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
