did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
