3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I have feelings that need drinking.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???